Here’s Chapter 21 from R Kelly’s ridiculous masterpiece, Trapped in the Closet. I’m always late to the game, and this time is no different. Watch this shit, it is fucking NUTS.
***video edited OUT
Let me now turn to Dank. Dank, you are gay. Do not play with my emotions by saying you are getting married, and then be like, “Nu huh, jk.” Bitch, please. You are officially the gayest, and your youtube video doesn’t work still, shithead.
Now Roughty. Where the fuck you at, bitch? Seems like you’re not doing shit these days except whining about some bullshit or something. Get off your lazy drunk ass and make yourself useful.
Operation Bunghole has been derailed by Dank’s falsimonius proclamations of marriagehood. I repeat, what a fucking gay move Dank. I can give you some slack because you wrote that bullshit in the backend and Suit published it, and I guess we all “jumped to conclusions.” However, in the wake of my “what the hell are you thinking” post that I tried to make real nice and supportive, I feel embarrassed and exposed. Boo on you for being such a toolbox; I don’t even want to get into why I think you did it. I will try to let it go for now.
Anyway, Operation Bunghole was an initial raging success. The Ministers of Sound helped to set the mood, and the party was alright at first. However, soon afterwards the festive atmosphere was overshadowed by rumors of an engagement of one of the Stonies, which then turned out to be nothing but an offensive fantasy…
What did we achieve though, in just 4 days of strategic execution and nuggetocity?
For a second, I felt a little unity, a little camaraderie.
I soon realized that no one else was down with the BungOp, with no real response from my camp, or yours either.
Then, we had Dank’s gay bullshit.
I was made a fool, a sensitive sucker played by the hucksta.
Friday is here, I have to focus on better things.
Like all-day class on Saturday. Quantitative Methods/ Accounting.
Followed by Monday, estimated arrival time at work 5:10 AM.
From which point, I will commence planning and execution of my next event, Operation Fucknugget.