Fear Not

Fear not ye who stare in dumbblankfacerificatio.  This blasphemous affront from he with the royal nose and created royal lineage will be met with brutally harsh impunity.  He will be crushed with my iron gauntlet as I mold his flacid will like a piece of wet clay. 

The King’s claim to royal lineage is false and ridiculous.  My children, King Stoney was once a young grasshopper in my School of Debaucherous Edification.  This State sponsored program reluctantly admitted the Prince to imbue the naive Prince with the necessary rejection of extravagant material objects and extravagant g.p.a.’s .  What the young Prince did not realize is that this propagandalistic program of debaucherous inundation and and murdering of reason was to weaken the privileged for our worker’s revolution.  My arduous work of the last few months, day in and out, working into the wee hours of the night, was for the building of my barnesian army. 

I am a man of the people.  My father, a poor dirt farmer who struck oil through his rural education, rose through the ranks of the privileged like the early Blogres lineage that King Stoney claims.  Abandoning me in his quest for the tainted coin,  I was raised in the hardened industrial center of our land.  I am a worker that will crush the priviliged and distribute their wealth to the people.  Rise against your attacking tyrannical despot who rules with wild passion and uncontrolled partiality.  Join the ranks of the industrialized worker.  Sign up at your local Volkswagen dealer.  

In my brilliant plan of genius, I paved the way to revolution through my puppet P.M. Sunburner.  He is a weak man of the senses swayed toward the passion.  He is a weakened by his addiction to the witch’s brew squeezed of the rotten teat.  His ludicrous claim of peak conditioning and corpus care are being revealed by the pictures provided by Morel the Destoryer, a man of truth.     


Taken after his royal decree last night


Suppressing the Truth


Destroyed by his Extravagance–Poisoned by Morel the Truthsayer

 Let this be a lesson to all who oppose the strengthening of the Bloggerland.  Sunburner is an example of any who stand in the way of our glorious revolution of the people.  Treacherous lechery will be Punished!

-Chancellor Ovaltine


5 Responses to “Fear Not”

  1. 1 stoneywageslave August 7, 2007 at 10:23 am

    i never claimed royal lineage. the title and duties were thrust upon me, based solely upon the manner in which my head sits upon my shoulders.

    perhaps if you could keep your chin up, you could have been blessed as i have.

    also, if i recall correctly, it was you who knighted me. perhaps obi-wan should have honed his own skills a bit more before tinkering with a “naive” soul, lest his pet project turn into a beast of darkness, like you hint that i have.

  2. 2 dankknuggets August 7, 2007 at 10:45 am

    anger leads to hate, hate leads to the darkside of the force. I love you stoneykan.

  3. 3 I'm No Yoko August 7, 2007 at 11:40 am

    Boys, I’ve had enough of your bullshit. Your blog is going downhill with all this talk of mutiny. Now I know this is going to be tough, but try to stop being such fagishly fagical nerds and focus on the more important issues at hand. I, for one, would like to read about the reunion in Venice. Just know that you guys have something special here. Don’t ruin it with nonsense posts and unnecessary bickering. All we are saying is give peace a chance and if you love someone say ob-la-di, ob-la-da.

  4. 4 stoneywageslave August 7, 2007 at 12:42 pm

    wannabe yoko…

    you starting shit?

    my guess is …. Nice Witch of the West, but that’s just because I’m a sleuth like that.

    a denton IP address + correct spelling + coherent thought does NOT = Twitchie



  5. 5 suityourself August 10, 2007 at 12:23 pm

    cant understand one sentence of this post. i am either too dumb or much too smart to understand what the shit he is talking about. dankkkkkkkkk, get a damn job. you got too much time on your hands.

    roughty, nice outfit. when did you turn gay?

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