Riding Bikes = Doing Drugs

Fucking retards.

What the fuck is up with cyclists these days? How many of them have to get busted or be shady before it’s just done, and they either quit testing or quit using.

So far the count is 3 out this year for being shady, including an entire team getting kicked out of the Tour de France for doping. Must suck to get busted for a drug that doesn’t even get you high.

Last year was hilarious, with Floyd Landis winning and then getting busted at the end. Classic. Floyd Landis, if you haven’t heard, is one fucking weird looking dude.

floyd_landis.jpg

2006-tdf-winner_floyd-landis1.jpg

Now this year, the leader of the race was kicked off his team, for missing two random drug tests. He says he was “in Mexico.” I’ve been to Mexico, and it always involves doing drugs of some kind. He should have said he was in Russia or something, or South Asia.

michael-rasmussen.jpg

Anyway, why don’t they quit? Don’t they know that when you are a mickey mouse rider, and all the sudden you kill everybody, that they are going to drug test you? After everyone is getting busted so bad….you STILL want to go do drugs?

I blame the French. Their weak-willed, socialist society cannot handle the responsibility of enforcing the rules, so now, the entire fucking scene has become a joke.

Freedom Fries Forever, bitches.

At least in America, we know that the athletes we love and admire come clean to the game, and keep the true spirit of competition alive by playing fair, and sticking to the rules.

God Bless America

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2 Responses to “Riding Bikes = Doing Drugs”


  1. 1 dankknuggets July 27, 2007 at 7:12 am

    Suit and I were watching Hooked: the History of Drugs, and it was on mary j and methamphetamines. anyway, there was a cyclist in the sixties or seventies in the tour de france that doped up on amphetamines and his heart exploded and he died. the heart can actually pump so fast and hard that the wall tears and the heart explodes.

    on a side note, related to the meth, amphetamines were distributed to Nazi panzer troups in 1939 during the blitzkreig. It seems the wonderous strategy of Hitler and his lackeys was only effective because of a bunch of speeded up aryans. also, american gi’s in the same war were rationed more cigarettes than food. two cartons a week. ciga, ciga, ciga, ciga, cigarette.

  2. 2 Roughty July 27, 2007 at 5:37 pm

    The History Channel is always playing that special, and it is a classic. But get your shit together Dank and post. Take some amphetamines if you have to.


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