United Flight 93

Just saw this piece of work, and let me tell you, it is a GEM. 9/11 is a tricky topic at this point of the game, 6 years out, and they made a movie about it. The whole time, I was thinking a ton of different shit.

First of all, the biggest question I had was…Why didn’t anybody stand up to the guys? In the movie, the two terrorists who are “controlling” the cabin of the plane literally look 18 and 20 years old. There’s no telling what they actually looked like or if they really didn’t have hair on their balls like it shows in the movie, but my point is….90 people vs. 5 people???? That’s right….90 to 5. Nearly a 20 to 1 ratio, and nobody can stand up and do shit about it? From what I hear, the ratio of men to women in the world is around 50/50, so I can only imagine that the plane had about 45 men, let’s say 25-30 of them full grown and able bodied. It still blows my mind that these people let the terrorists do all this shit, fly their plane around and shit, without standing up with a fight. Who gives a fuck if the guy is wearing a bomb, I thought this part of the movie was ridiculous. For a more recent example…how do you let that crazy dude at V. Tech shoot up 32 people. 32 fucking people, and not one person does a kamikaze charge. I mean come the fuck on, I want to make a video game joke here, but I’m not going to….

Second, they made the Americans on the plane look verrrrry Abercrombie and Fitch, “I was on the lacrosse, water polo and football varsity teams in college” blabla. The two “big guys” on the plane literally looked like they had been pulled off the pages of a Gap or A&F catalogue, complete with dark green cargo pants, cool hats, deep red, all American plaid shirts, and huge chiseled jaws. One dude looked like fucking Pat Tillman, it was ridiculous. Then, they made the terrorists these little babies who looked like they were in their teens still. This goes back to point #1, which also creates a conundrum for the filmmakers…. If the terrorists were such little pussy bitches, who like I said before, don’t have hair on their fucking balls and don’t want to start the hijacking as planned, and are portrayed as such losers….why the fuck couldn’t these varsity all-star macho beefhead hunks do anything about it? I counted about 5 “meatheads”, in addition to an unnamed/focused “40” other male characters who should have been kicking some serious jihad fucking ass, but guess what they were doing????? WHAT WERE THE MEN, THE PROTECTORS AND BEASTS DOING INSTEAD OF BEATING THE FUCK OUT OF THOSE TERRORISTS?????

THEY WERE ON THE FUCKING CELLPHONE!!

In one of the most INSANE twists of human planning and psychology, for the first half hour of the hijacking, NO ONE DOES JACK SHIT EXCEPT CALL THEIR FRIENDS ON THE PHONE TO SAY GOODBYE. I’ve got some news, people. If I am in a life or death situation that can, with a little skill, cooperation and bravery, be swiftly reconciled, I am going to wait until I have the shit under control before I call jimmy john and tell him I love him. It wasn’t just 1 person on the phone either….LITERALLY EVERY PERSON ON THE PLANE IS TALKING ON THE GODDAMN PHONE. Social commentary, anyone? Or is that just how we are, and the filmmakers are presenting this with absolute zero irony. Either way, it’s ridiculous.

Work as a team? Nope, I’m on the phone. Let’s get these terrorists who are threatening us…Nope, sorry talking to my dad. Right before the end of the movie, one guy even calls 911…911 people, 911, waaaay late in the game. It made absolutely no sense to me.

The irony comes when….DUH, 90 PEOPLE CAN TAKE THE PLANE BACK FROM 5. Wow, with a little planning, they take over the plane in less than 5 minutes. Less than 5 minutes. No fucking shit….then the movie people get all gory and bloody when they show the Americans killing the guy, almost like a horror movie. It’s hard to get up and cheer, though, knowing they are going to die, and knowing that if they had started doing that just a little sooner, no shit…they can take the plane back.

I think you get what I’m saying. The point is really driven home, when someone’s husband on the phone tells the people “they flew 2 planes into the World Trade Center.” Next thing you know, there is a huge game of Telephone going on, with each person passing it on.

“They flew 2 planes into the WTC, pass it on” they whisper down the line, getting all agitated and nimbly bimbly. Even after they know they are on a suicide mission, no one does anything about it until it is way too late. They do the same thing when someone sees the dead pilots.

“The pilots are dead, pass it on.”

“We’re all fucked, pass it on.”

Give me a fucking break. I am a huge pussy. I don’t get in fights or act macho at all. I pray that I will have the nuts to do something to save myself and others around me if shit were to hit the fan. United 93, get the fuck off the phone and take back your plane. The terrorists are just effeminate Iranian students who hate your “freedom,” so stand up and do something before they crash that shit into the White House.

I was done, but then I said “White House…” Where the fuck was the President? Why the fuck did they not shoot that shit down? Was there not just the slightest possibility that he could have done something, anything to prevent the Pentagon plane from crashing, or to shoot down United 93? We only have 4 jets on the entire East Coast…and THEY DON’T HAVE ANY FUCKING MISSILES?????? We have the “most badass” military in the world…..except when we get attacked on our own soil in the biggest and brightest city in our nation….and we don’t have ANY FUCKING PROTECTION????? WHAT??????

Instead of spending billions of dollars on the space race and satellite anti-missiles, why not spend a few bucks and put some fucking missiles and bullets into the planes that are defending our country, so if need be, they can do something other than visually spot the threat and “ram the plane” with their own plane. This isn’t bumper cars, people, it’s violent terrorism.

At the end of the day, I am let down by my government. I paid my taxes, my dad was a veteran, and I’m sure I have more of them going up the line. Please, please respect my American heritage, and everyone else’s, and do a better job of protecting us, Mr. Government. Also, that includes not getting us knee-deep in a shit hole of a war that is creating an even larger army of one-arm child casualties, who will grow up to make little 2-armed jihadist babies, who are watching a Mickey Mouse cartoon on Saturday mornings, telling them to kill the Jews and the Americans. Jesus we are in some deep shit, and we are all too fucking drunk, fat and self-absorbed to do anything about it.

God Bless America

****Editor’s Note: Does anyone remember that shit with Ron Paul that just happened? He quotes the 9/11 commission report’s findings…that US foreign policy in the Middle East is one of the primary reasons that they sicked the jihad on our ass….he fucking says that, and Rudy Guliani says, “oh ive heard a lot of crazy things, but that is just outrageous blabla i was there blabla….” fuckhead. if, as a nation of people, cannot grasp the fact that when we bomb other countries and kill women and children and civilians…that when we do that to someone for a decade, and impose sanctions which force children to go hungry…..THOSE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO FUCKING COME AND GET US. IMAGINE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF A COUNTRY BOMBED US A FEW TIMES A YEAR TO GO AFTER THE “UNFAVORABLES” OR WHATEVER, TO KEEP STRATEGIC POWER. We would nuke the fuck out of that country. We would NUKE the FUCK out of any country that does 1/100 of the shit we do. Iraq war – over 60,000 confirmed civilian deaths so far. 9/11 – 3,000 (we’ll say).

Our foreign policy breeds anti-American terrorism. Period. If you do not understand or believe this, then you are part of the reason that this shit is going down. Fuck off.

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4 Responses to “United Flight 93”


  1. 1 dankknuggets May 23, 2007 at 7:53 pm

    el presidente did give the order to shoot down planes, it only leads to the question of when he did. as for the hurried, desensitizing major motion picture, we must at least entertain the possibility of diversion. in short, i’m not sure on either the heroic stand or militaristic self defense, but i know i believe more that it was shot down.

    interesting tidbit, i’ve been reading bob woodward’s (watergate) book, “Bush at War”, and i can assure you of some fucked up shit in this source. from day one, sept 12, everyone was talking iraq, except the president, which the book seems unfairly courteous to his rank. though he hops and skips around any negative tone in speaking of the president, he is always critical of every other person involved. the one surprising thing, though later blamed for everything with rumsfeld and everyone else not reappointed for the second term, powell always seemed to be the voice of reason. very methodical, perhaps a bit slow to act, but always acting and speaking with sensibility.

    rumsfeld i was surprised to find, is from the old guard republicans. very cold war, very brash, but always obsessed with all the details and the big picture, it seems his political career started under LBJ, certainly a dastardly fellow, and continued under nixon, though he was oddly sent to germany as ambassador during 70 and 71, right when watergate started to leak. woodward, the father of the national truth-telling, did not make much of it however. seeing as he basically got the whole scoop, it seems to discredit this line of reasoning. anywho, rumsfeld was in fact a bitter political rival of George Bush sr. bush seemed a bit more diplomatic and accomodating, but rumsfeld, was pushy, obsessed, and definitely more of a numbers guy. rumsfeld was so pissed when bush was announced for president, basically saying he was a nancy. so, time passed, his sway grew and when W came to office, he was given one of the most coveted positions for a republican, defense. i can assure you, the war’s failure as a war is not for rumsfeld lack of vigor or effort. then of course he was booted, but went down swinging,

    colon powell, however, was unfairly disgraced. the only non-war monger, they blamed him for wartime foreign policy forgetting everyone wanted a war. remember sitting in ez e’s room watching tv on his computer seeing the first waves of operation enduring freedom? “YEAH, AFGHANISTAND DID IT”

    i know e was the only one in the room that said kill those fuckers. of course, quite an anomaly to have three non-bloodthrirsty americans in the same room in september 2001.

    thank you stoney for nobody realizes we are at war right now. no, it’s not a joke, people are really dying and kids younger than us are having arms blown off, intestines spilling out, bones coming through the skin, legs that look like hamburger helper.

    yes we are screwing the united states, the great beacon of liberty by strengthening the empire with a crusade of revenge. retaliation is understandable, humans are weak, but international vengeance with a unfallible belief in its benediction will always end in horrible tragedy, this however will be global.

  2. 2 colon farrel May 24, 2007 at 4:48 am

    dank nuggets has arrived

  3. 3 Roughty May 24, 2007 at 10:05 am

    SNAP! DankNuggets, laying it down. Bonus points for the EZ E cameo.

  4. 4 suityourself May 25, 2007 at 10:25 am

    stoney and dank(kk) already laid down the whole shooting match. i don’t need to add anything. country’s going down faster than a racecar and harder than ron jeremy. everybody better make friends with a foreigner pretty damned quick so we can have some place to run to when the proverbial shit hits the hypothetical fan.


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