Is there anything the Chinese can’t do?

Seriously, is there?  Take a look at this kid who was recently crowned king, at the world yo-yo championships.

Simply, astounding.  I bet this kid is pulling all sorts of ladies with his skills.  Apparently, he shoots out his yo-yo like Spiderman, and wraps the string around the girl’s waist.  When he pulls her back, she comes twirling toward him, and she is instantly his.

For some reason, the Chinese have the uncanny ability to take things we see as novelties such as, yo-yos and Dance Dance Revolution, and completely master them to previously unheard of levels.

We used to think we had basketball superiority over Asians.  Well, somehow they manufactured a seven and a half foot Yao Ming, and sent him to the US to play ball.  In an unrelated piece of news, apparently this Chinese giant has gained the ability to give birth.




(For those of you not in the know, that is Nate Robinson Yao is giving birth to.  He is the 5’9 New York Knicks point guard who won the dunk contest in 2006.  What an adorable family this will be.)

All this however, pales in comparison to what they are cooking up next.  Now, Chinese scientists are planning on controlling the weather.  Through a process dubbed, “cloud-seeding” the Chinese are planning on inducing rain before the 2008 Beijing Olympics to ensure fair weather for the competitors.  I, for one, believe they can do this.  When it comes to the Chinese and seeding, they are light-years ahead of the rest of the world with a population their size.   

They are also attempting this feat as a means to clean their air.  Beijing is one of the world leaders in air pollution, making it an obvious choice as a venue for elite athletic competition.  I hear the IOC is planning to use an active volcanic crater as the site for the 2012 Summer Olympics.  It makes the Olympics fun, adding environmental factors for increased drama.

So to answer my previous question, no, nothing is impossible for the Chinese.  Whether you want yo-yo superiority, weather control, or a 7 1/2 foot man to dunk and give birth. 

3 Responses to “Is there anything the Chinese can’t do?”

  1. 1 stoneywageslave May 3, 2007 at 9:28 am

    My co-worker and boss are both from China.

  2. 2 stoneywageslave May 3, 2007 at 9:28 am

    i mean they are Chinese, not that they are Chinamen.

  3. 3 music therapy July 12, 2013 at 2:39 pm

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