…about adding new posts so often. This is not what a blog is for… Plus, it makes me look like I’ve nothing better to do. Oh, wait a second…

Anyway, to keep the St. Patrick’s Day train rolling on through, I have compiled my own list of dos and don’ts and will, below, submit them for your approval.

1. Do — drive! Come on, the Irish sailed across the ocean bound for a country they’d never seen in person. Isn’t this slightly scarier than 1 night in jail with some other drunk ass fucks?!

2. Don’t — wear beer-goggles! The fun of St. Patrick’s Day will come and go, but VD never goes away. Am I right? Come on… Am I right?! Use discretion, or else get ready for some bad bad things.

3. Do — get in a fight! What better occasion to break out the fisticuffs (sp?). You’ll already be in full uniform, so get drunk and assume the pose of your favorite mascot and mine — the Fighting Mick of Notre Dame.

4. Don’t — bring money! If you’re one of those people who needs extra motivation to steal and beg drinks off people all night, this will do the trick. Plus, the cops won’t arrest you if you pull your pockets inside out. They’ll think your a wandering grifter and let you be.

5. Do — bring some stuff to sell! If you’re into drizzugs or bootleg CD’s, once the liquor starts flowing, you can really make some quick bucks. Plus, since you won’t have your wallet, the trade goods will work if you are forced to barter for alcohol.

6. Don’t — bring a camera! You may think the camera will motivate the hot women to disrobe in your presence, but this is just not the case. You’re more likely to see some naked Irishman’s ass, and there’s no doubt you’ll get your shit mugged for that new digi-cam your mom just bought you.

7. Do — wear a costume! If you happen to commit some crimes, no one will be able to pick you out of a line-up without your green bowler cap, suspenders and leprechaun shoes.

8. Don’t — ever tell anyone what you see! If you see some bad ass shit going down while you’re out, (and you will), the best thing to do is just forget about it. Chances are really good that somebody saw you doing something much worse. Just think back… Oh yeah, you know what I’m talking about. And once the accusations start flying, you won’t have a girlfriend, a house, a car or even any pets. It’s best to leave well enough alone and forget whatever stuff you see.


You have passed the McSuityourself McSaint Patrick’s McDay McTraining Course! Now you can get wasted and cause massive trouble in the most responsible fashion possible.

By the way, has any mention yet been made on this blog of a man named JB and the heist associated with him?? Deddog?? Stoney?? You know what I’m talkin about.

Damn, that shit was “wizard smoke.”


2 Responses to “Sorry…”

  1. 1 Roughty March 16, 2007 at 3:46 pm

    Do – excessively use exclamation points!!! I love you suit. Good to have you back.

  2. 2 deddog March 16, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    oh man, is this the infamous former voice of pet world? perhaps our heroic journey into the bowells of phi tau that faithful wed. night before exams deserves chronicling.

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