NASCAR needs to change something.

It’s early, I’m tired, and I don’t really want to do much.  However, I am compelled to put an ultimatum on NASCAR.  (Because they so obviously care about my opinions).  I love sports, any sport.  There’s something about the competition, the athleticism required, and the sense of accomplishment when you reach the pinnacle of your respective sport.   

NASCAR does not interest me in the slightest.  I don’t know where this boom of NASCAR merchandising and promotion came from, nor do I care.  Now before I have to hear from another mongoloid enthusiast, “Lookey here Yankee, ye gotta go to da race.  Where my woman?” I will admit that I have never been to an event.  I will reserve my final judgment on this “sport” until that day comes, but watching it on TV is completely asinine.  But this post is not a judgment, merely a statement to NASCAR.  You really need to change how you denote the driver who starts the race in first. 

Pole sitter?!?!  Are you serious?  You call him the fucking POLE SITTER?!  How can I take something seriously, when they call the guy who qualifies first, a fucking pole sitter?  If I was a driver I would be seriously offended.  Yet, it does not stop there, the announcers love to interject the monotony with various derivations of pole sitter.  “Oh look there goes the number, who gives a fuck car.  He sat on the pole this morning.”  “They had a real fast car in practice this week, with some luck this guy will be sitting on the pole come Sunday.”  When does it end?  Never. 

With a “sport” that has been plagued by claims of intolerance, and cannot escape the stigma of an activity for southern bumpkins to congregate and booze, how the fuck can they throw around pole sitter so willy nilly about their beloved drivers?  This phrase alone is the beginning of a laundry list of reasons I don’t watch this garbage. 

SIDE NOTE:  Ok so you dropped Winston as your sponsor.  You figured you shouldn’t promote lung cancer anymore.  That’s cool.  Just one question.  How the fuck can you have cars promoting Crown Royale and Jack Daniels?  Drunk driving is not exactly what I would try and associate my “sport” with.  Furthermore, they have the audacity to run promos for said liquors during commercial breaks that tell me to drink responsibly.  Fuck you I will drink however I want, I’m not the one putting a liquor advertisement on cars.  There are so many contradictions in this “sport”, it makes my head spin.  

BONUS SIDE NOTE:  For those of you who have been subjected to watching a race on Speed Channel ( I used to have a boss who loved him some racin’!) you will undoubtedly know the guy I speak of.  NASCAR, and everyone involved, has been trying to escape the fact that this “sport” is just for southern idiots with about as many teeth as a hockey team.  Yet, they cannot control the urge to promote just that fact.  Whoever the guy on Speed Channel is who begins every race with his highly annoying catch phrase, “Boogity, boogity, boogity, let’s go racin’” is not helping the schism of NASCAR from the Confederate nation.  He just needs a good pole sit.


1 Response to “NASCAR needs to change something.”

  1. 1 suityourself March 26, 2007 at 7:28 am

    excellent points roughty. i think they do the pole-sitter thing just to see how many viewers are sober enough to catch the humor… i don’t know how i missed this post. i must have been stoned and skipped over it… i don’t care what maeve says. you can write!

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